1103 - حُدودُ الصَّداقَةِ

1103. The Extent of One’s Friendship

3504.الإمامُ عليٌّ عليه السلام : الصَّديقُ الصَّدوقُ : مَن نَصَحَكَ في عَيبِكَ، وحَفِظَكَ في غَيبِكَ ، وآثَرَكَ على‏ نَفسِهِ .¹

3504.Imam Ali (AS) said, ‘A sincere friend is he who advises you with regard to your shortcomings, protects you in your absence, and prefers you over himself.’²

3505.الإمامُ عليٌّ عليه السلام : اُبذُلْ لِصَدِيقِكَ كُلَّ المَوَدَّةِ ، ولا تَبذُل لَهُ كُلَّ الطُمأنِينَةِ .³

3505.Imam Ali (AS) said, ‘'Shower all your love on your friend but do not shower all your trust on him.’⁴

3506.الإمامُ الصّادقُ عليه السلام : لا تَكونُ الصَّداقَةُ إلّا بِحُدُودِها، فَمَن كانَت فيهِ هذهِ الحُدودُ أو شَي‏ءٌ مِنهُ ، وإلّا فلا تَنسِبْهُ إلى‏ شَي‏ءٍ مِن الصَّداقَةِ ، فَأوَّلُها : أن تكونَ سَرِيرَتُهُ وعَلانِيَتُهُ لكَ واحِدَةً ، والثانيةُ : أن يَرى‏ زَينَكَ زَينَهُ ، وشَينَكَ شَينَهُ ، والثالثةُ : أن لا تُغَيِّرَهُ علَيكَ وِلايَةٌ ولا مالٌ ، والرابعةُ : لا يَمنَعُكَ شَيئاً تَنالُهُ مَقدُرَتُهُ ، والخامسةُ - وهي تَجمَعُ هذهِ الخِصالَ - : أن لا يُسلِمَكَ عِندَ النَّكَباتِ .⁵

3506.Imam al-Sadiq (AS) said, ‘Friendship can only succeed when its conditions are fulfilled, and he who fulfils all or some of these conditions may be befriended, and if not, then do not attribute any of your friendship to him. The first of these conditions is that he should treat you in public the same as he treats you in private. Secondly, that your source of pride is a source of pride for him, and your source of shame is a source of shame for him too. Thirdly, that neither position nor wealth should change him towards you. Fourthly, that he must not prevent you from obtaining that which you have the capacity for, and fifthly – and this sums up all the other qualities – that he must not give up on you in times of misfortune.’⁶